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→ 7 Segredos Para Cuidar do Amor

O amor. Todos os casamentos têm lutas e podem surgir em qualquer momento. O fundamental é aprender a supera-las de forma que não ameacem a sua relação. Não importa quanto tempo leve de casado, existem regras simples e básicas para percorrer o caminho. Colocá-las em prática nem sempre é fácil, mas é vital. Se as seguir, vai fortalecer seu vínculo… e verá que as coisas boas, diversão, sexo, confiança, afeto…se darão melhor do que nunca.

7 SEGREDOS PARA CUIDAR DO AMOR

  • 1-Encontre um equilíbrio

O tédio, a frustração e as fricções diárias podem extinguir a chama do amor. Para alimentá-lo, concentre-se nas coisas boas. Mas, como? Primeiro, tenha em mente que precisa de até 20 comentários positivos para neutralizar o dano feito por um negativo (ou por um olhar frio ou um gesto de impaciência). Assim, usa-se mais os primeiros e menos os segundos. Lisonjeia a camisa nova do seu marido, agradeça a ajuda dele nos serviços de casa, por exemplo. Faça contato visual quando sorrir ou diga algo bom, e trata-se de acompanhá-lo com um som de alegria (por exemplo, um suspiro de satisfação).

  • 2-Mantenha a proximidade

O toque humano libera endorfinas, que fazem você se sentir bem a quem dá e a quem recebe. Então, atire as mãos com maior frequência. Acaricia seu rosto quando dar os bons dias. Reviva a forma em que se tocavam no início da relação: dê um beijo atrás da orelha, passe a mão pelo cabelo.
Guarda os seus segredos, embora no escritório todos tenham os seus parceiros.
Façam o compromisso de conversar 30 minutos por dia sobre seus planos diários, metas e sonhos. Não vale falar de coisas da casa, nem de sua relação. Trata-se de construir uma amizade. Os estudos mostram que ser amigos tem recompensas, pois garante uma união mais meiga e sensual. E não se esqueça de encontrar tempo para a intimidade, mesmo que tenha que anotar na sua agenda. Como programar o sexo? Se for necessário, sim. Ser espontâneo é bom, mas nem sempre é possível.

  • 3-Lembre-se: ninguém é perfeito

É tentador culpar o cônjuge quando você se sente irritada, desiludida, aborrecida ou pressionada, é fácil acreditar que seu parceiro deve se transformar para melhorar as coisas.

Cuidado: tentar mudar o outro deve colocá-lo na defensiva e se tornará mau do filme. O resultado? Ninguém muda, ninguém assume a responsabilidade, todos serão infelizes. E culpar seu cônjuge significa ignorar a 90 por cento de tudo de bom que você tem.

Todos os dias deste mês, escolha algo que você gosta dele: “Meu marido é considerado”, ou “Meu marido me faz rir” e pensa em fatos específicos que justifiquem: “Ele lavou o carro ontem” ou “Se eu estou triste, me anima com seu bom humor”.

  • 4-Mantém a faísca de sua relação

Você costumava preocupar-se muito com seu cabelo, procurava sempre a peça mais sensual para chamar a atenção de seu parceiro, e agora sabe bem com calças velhas e uma camiseta desbotada para dormir. É hora de melhorar sua aparência. Penteia esse cabelo, lave os dentes e compre uma lingerie nova. Sentir-se confortável com sua aparência ele observará em seu olhar. É mais provável que você faça contato visual, e isso acende a faísca para o seu cônjuge. E você já sabe o que fazer depois!

  • 5-Sempre luta limpo

A primeira coisa é deixar a crítica, o confronto e a hostilidade, que só adicionam a lenha para o fogo. Pesquisadores da Universidade da Califórnia, que estudaram a 79 casais durante mais de uma década descobriram que aqueles que se divorciaram logo, lutou uma luta longa e escandalosa, e estavam sempre na defensiva ou prontos para atacar. Pelo contrário, os casais felizes evitam a verbalizar os pensamentos críticos, impedem que as discussões saiam do controle, e não usam palavras como “nunca” e “sempre”. Se tem uma luta, muda o tema, injeta um pouco de humor no momento, mostre ao seu cônjuge empatia ou passe um gesto especialmente afetuoso. Se é tarde para isso, pede uma trégua, afaste-se e tente se recompor.

  • 6-Escolha o melhor momento e lugar

Não começar uma conversa que possa se tornar uma discussão quando estão cansados ou com fome. Nunca tente discutir questões conjugais importantes se você estiver ocupado com outra coisa. Desligue a televisão ou o computador, pegue o telefone e feche o livro. Se está distraído ou a ponto de sair, escolha outro momento para falar. Os conflitos não se resolvem as esperma.

Os estudos mostram que as crianças se desenvolvem melhor (e aprendem a conviver com os outros) quando seus pais resolvem os conflitos de forma construtiva, mas desenvolvem inseguranças e problemas de conduta se passam ouvindo gritos.

  • 7-Ouça

O melhor para manter um casamento sólido é falar menos e ouvir mais. As culpas, os insultos e as lutas só levam a um final ruim ou, pelo menos, a um inferno em vida. Se uma conversa se torna uma discussão, não interrompa, oferece uma solução. Os sentimentos à flor da pele precisam ser expostos. Senta com a cabeça, reafirma o que você expresse a seu parceiro ou dê um suave “a-ha” para demonstrar que toma em conta as emoções por trás das palavras. Às vezes, tudo o que precisamos para nos sentirmos mais perto de alguém é prestar mais atenção ao que diz.

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7 Segredos Para Cuidar do Amor
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Juliana Dias

Sobre o autor | Website

Olá, meu nome é Juliana, tenho 27 anos, sou apaixonada por assuntos relacionados ao mundo masculino. E estou aqui para ajudar você mulher a saber tudo sobre os homens, seja na arte da conquista ou reconquista. Espero que eu possa contribuir verdadeiramente em seus relacionamentos, e qualquer coisa entre em contato ;)

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